How long does it take to fall out of love?
I’ve seen a couple of posts and heard a morning talk show discussing the seven-year itch now becoming the three-year glitch.
When I first read the headline on Yahoo.com…, I didn’t pay it much attention but did kind of wonder what they were talking about. One morning while watching an early show, the host was about to introduce a popular actor who has been married for three years. Strangely, the host mentioned this topic along with his introduction of the actor. I think the actor was a little embarrassed that they would infer his marriage was starting to lose its luster, especially after such a period.
One of my relationship fears is getting involved with someone who thinks it’s ok to fall out of love as easily as we fell for each other. I know that relationships will have their ups and downs but how do you survive those low points. I enjoy meeting guys and fantasizing about a future with them but it honestly scares me to think about committing the rest of my life to them. My fear is not grounded in my inability to commit but the strength of my desire to stick with it forever. I often think I want something that lifetime commitments aren’t possible to attain in our society. I want someone who I can let down my guard with and honestly stand before God and man to proclaim my love through sickness and health, for richer or for poorer, in good times and bad until death do we part.
Part of the issue is me. I start to get to know someone and know from the time that we spend together that I can’t make those proclamations. Despite how great the person looks on paper, as in once you list all of their qualifications, I know that my heart isn’t there. The other part of the issue is fear. Yes, I can admit that I am afraid of falling head over heels in love only to find that he doesn’t love me back. I am afraid of mentally, emotionally and spiritually committing my life to a man and three years later I find out there is a glitch in our relationship or seven years later he has an itch that I can’t scratch.
I don’t know what the solution is or how I will overcome this mental hang-up and make the ultimate committment but I think acknowledging the problem is the beginning to finding a solution.
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