I fall asleep each night to the sound of your voice and the unspoken words that remind that I am not alone in my desire to be close and warm from the sensation of understanding I’m able to lay my head down to rest next to a small well worn stack of books heaped one on top of the other breathing life into my quiet space eliminating the emptiness of the distance between us making me feel safe at night. I know that you would smile and say that that sounds silly but somehow you would understand my desperation for security and my desire to run from that feeling because it infiltrates my dreams at night and the moments we share in my minds eye keep me tossing and turning with a smile so i keep them there, my small stack of books because before i drift to sleep they quietly remind me that it is okay to care, to dream of your face and wake up smiling from the promises we shared and yes, my small stack of books ease me into my land of dreams and whisper that this feeling is nothing new, nothing rare, its as simple as me missing you, each aspect of you, the presence of the thoughts and passion and laughter and tears and hopes and motivations of the fictitious characters whose creators have taught them, and me subsequently, how to cope with love come and gone that is as real as yours and mine will keep the space warm until the weight of you and your thoughts and passion and laughter and tears and hopes and motivations and desperation to be near me fill the space and dull my senses causing me to fall deep into the sweetest sleep resting freely in the nearness of you
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